November where it all began[Lilith Hallows-Mature] Dec 4, 2011 21:06:41 GMT -4
Post by Nekayne on Dec 4, 2011 21:06:41 GMT -4
Police records have shown that there were often a lot of calls to the dilapidated house on Boultar Street. Because of this, Cheryl didn’t really seem surprised that a body had been found there, stabbed to death. It was the owner of the house’s body – a woman in her mid-thirties with a body showing severe drug abuse. The house had obviously not been cleaned in a long time and lacked many proper necessities. Cheryl could almost feel the tension steaming off of the walls in a chilling fashion. The suspects were here not long ago. She knew it.
Upon arriving, Cheryl looked down at the Coroner who was bent at the deceased woman’s side. Feeling her presence, the Coroner looked up at Cheryl with a nod of greeting. “Gloria Hallows. Thirty-six years old. Drivers license is outdated but it lists this house as her address. Guessing single. As far as I know there doesn’t seem to be trace of a significant other living here. Just…a party house.”
Cheryl gave the Coroner a nod. “How long until you’re done?”
“About another twenty minutes. I’ll call you when I’m done.”
“Alright. I’m going to look around upstairs.”
With her silver case in hand, Cheryl began to climb the stairs, her steps delicate as she noticed the sinking floorboards creaking beneath her polished shoes. She carefully watched her steps, making sure not to step on anything that seemed suspicious, though the stairs were stained with many different things that she couldn’t quite identify.
Noticing two separate doorways, one opened and one closed, Cheryl backed towards the stairs so that her voice could reach the Coroner. “Hey, did anyone clear up here?”
“It should be. I saw an officer go up.”
“Then why is the door closed?” Cheryl called back, although no response came. Setting her case down, Cheryl began to slowly approach the door, her heart beating a little faster as her hands were held slightly away from her hips. The door shouldn’t be closed if someone checked it. Why was it closed?
Cheryl’s gloved hand slowly reached for the scuffed brass handle. Just as soon as her fingers lightly brushed it, the door swung inwards, causing Cheryl to startle back and reach for her assigned pistol.
“Whoa, Cheryl, calm down.”
Cheryl gave a sigh of relief as a comrade opened the door. She returned the half-drawn pistol to it’s holder before putting a hand to her chest. “Geez, Eric, why do you have the door closed?”
Eric gave a heavy sigh as he shrugged his broad shoulders. He gave his head a sad shake – something he rarely ever did. It wasn’t like him to show emotion. “This was a little girl’s room. There isn’t a little girl here. It’s covered in dust. I don’t think there has been a child here for a long time.”
Cheryl blinked, intrigued as Eric backed up so she may enter the room. Although décor was lacking, it was definitely belonging to a girl at one point in time. Dirtied pieces of clothing scattered the floor and a stuffed animal was throw here or there, but other then that the room was nearly untouched and unfurnished.
Eric reached his arm out, gesturing to the unmade bed that had been canopied by cobwebs. “There was a diary on the bed. I took a look at it. I think you should read the last entry.”
Cheryl looked at Eric with concern on her face, but Eric looked away as he tried to mask his emotions like he normally did. He silently took his leave, brushing past his comrade as his steps were heard slowly making their way down the creaky stairs.
Cheryl brought herself closer to the bed, eyeing the diary. The pages were yellowed and the dust on the front had been disturbed, most likely from Eric picking it up. Cheryl repeated his actions and picked up the book, noting that the scrawl did match that of a young girl. She flipped to the back pages and found the last date that went back to November, twelve years prior.These are the last few pages of you, diary. I am going to fill you up now. I’ve told you things I would never tell anyone else, especially not the school councillors. They’re not trying to help. They’re trying to hurt me or embarrass me. I know it.
I feel like this is the end.
I’ve been fighting this for way too long. I thought that maybe if I stayed strong and tried to battle it, it would fix itself…that mom wouldn’t be so deep in the bottle and maybe start being a mom. That maybe all the people would go away. That maybe I could go to sleep without fear of what I’ll find in the morning or what I’ll get woken up by in the middle of the night.
I don’t understand it. I’ve been trying hard, haven’t I? I might not be getting the best grades but I try and I might not have many friends but I at least try to be nice. I try to clean up and do what I can for mom when she’s crying like giving her Kleenex and hugs or when she passes out I try to pull her onto the couch and give her a blanket. I try to stop the fights in the house and I scrub the blood out of the carpet although it never really comes clean. Doesn’t hard work and staying good and true make everything better?
Finn punched his girlfriend last night and a brawl broke out in the living room. The coffee table cracked because she fell on it as he was beating her down. What little things we had left started getting broken and smashed and I had to clean up the glass in the morning, though I stepped on the ones I couldn’t see and it took some time to try and get all the pieces out of my foot. There was no knives this time but the coffee table has some blood on it from where Finn’s head got cracked on it when another guy (I don’t know who he is, he’s a new face) slammed his forehead against it. I’m not sure where Finn is now, but he just kind of stumbled out of the house yelling something not very clearly. I was watching all this from the staircase. It’s where I go when these things happen. It’s frightening to watch but at the same time I’m too scared of what will happen when I’m not there.
I didn’t write a couple days ago because it got so scary here that I just ran outside and I didn’t come back for a while. I slept in the back alley near Tai’s Variety. I forgot to bring anything with me but that’s because of what was happening. I got really mad and frustrated with everything. Mom said she was going to give up the crack but then I saw Elise give her a pipe. I just got so mad that I couldn’t see anything else. I took the pipe and I threw it at the wall and it broke. Elise got even more mad and began beating down on me. I managed to get away but I had a sprained wrist and I think I still have a black eye. I’ve been trying to cover it with mom’s concealer but it didn’t work very well because Ms. Barnes still noticed. She’s always up in my business. I just don’t want to talk to her or anyone there. I know they just want to tell everyone in school what’s happening and I don’t want people looking at me in that way anymore.
So I spent a few nights in the alley until I thought that maybe Elise left or at least forgot about it. It was really cold and damp. Even though it’s winter, there is no snow but there has been lots of rain. It rained one of the nights but I found a spot against a building that the rain didn’t hit as much. The rain was like ice. It should have been snow. I really can’t stand the cold and the wet. I cried a lot in the alley and I was so hungry. When I got back to the house, I went straight for the fridge but there wasn’t really anything in there so I just drank a lot of water from the tap.
Last night was the worst. And I don’t mean about Finn punching his girlfriend.
I managed to get to sleep and I still heard some shouts coming from downstairs. I figured if I went to bed now then I wouldn’t have to deal with all the stuff that came afterwards. What if the police came again? I really hated when they talked to me and I didn’t want them to see my black eye. I woke up when I heard my door creek open but I pretended to be asleep so I wouldn’t have to talk to anyone.
Now I wish I would have moved or said something right away. One of the newer guys came in. I think his name was Adrian or something. I’m not sure since these guys never use their real names anyways. I always felt so uncomfortable around Adrian. He always just stared at me in a way that made me feel cold and scared, and I really hate the cold.
I peeked while pretending to be asleep and Adrian stood above my bed, staring at me. It got so scary that I opened my eyes. Before I could ask him what he was doing, he clapped his hand over my mouth and threw the blankets off my bed. I hate the cold. Adrian’s hand was cold. I think at that moment I could tell he was a Pokemorph – an ice type, maybe, but I didn’t know what kind.
I yelled against Adrian’s hand and tried to get it off but his other one held me down by my neck. He told me that if I screamed I wouldn’t wake up in the morning. His fingers went up my nightdress and towards my underwear and I couldn’t help scream against his hand, which caused him to squeeze my neck until I stopped.
I don’t even know how to explain what happened next. I don’t think I want to explain it. All I know is it hurt a lot. I cried so hard. He was so rough with me. I think one of my ribs are broken because when I bend to the left it hurts so much. He was so cold. I hate the cold.
I think this is the last I can take, diary. I’m only twelve years old and I got raped. Wasn’t I trying hard enough? Weren’t things supposed to get better? I remember someone telling me something like “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em”. I’m not sure why they said it, but I remember it.
I can’t beat them. I’ve tried so hard and I can’t. Joining them will just be easier. It will take the pain away. Mom drinks and she doesn’t seem to hurt when she does. She always gets angry or in pain when she doesn’t drink. I can just do the same, can’t I?
I don’t want to hurt anymore. I have to become one of them.